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The Club was full of sad vampires. - Elf M. Sternberg
elfs
elfs
The Club was full of sad vampires.
The club was full of sad vampires.

Omaha and I had managed to find a sitter for Wednesday night. Lisa, who had recovered from a terrible chest cold, offered her services and even offered to take the girls to the weekly family swim at the local pool, so we took her up on the offer and swept outselves out to a restaurant and then over to the club.

The restaurant we hit was the Flying Fish, a place on 1st Avenue famed for their seafood and feared for their prices. Omaha and I shared a bowl of steamed mussles, then she had crab cakes and I had the cold-seared Ahi tuna. When they say "cold seared," they mean it: the fish is lain cold on a hot skillet just long enough to sear the outside and kill any bacteria, then served with the core of the thick fish cool and still quivering. A hash of diced onions perfectly herbed complemented the meal wonderfully. The price was outrageous, and not something to be repeated often, but it was still exceptional.

We went to the club. Our first sign that this wasn't going to be our night was the music: surf music. Inside, the club was dead, maybe 25 people, a third of its usual draw. The theme was surf night, with Hawaiian shirts and grass skirts. As we walked into the socializing area we passed by a buxom woman wearing a red bra and brown cotton skirt. Three men had been buzzing around her politely, only one of whom I recognized. The woman looked up at me and Omaha and said, "Hi! Are you new here?"

We both bust out laughing, and so did one of the three around her. Our ID cards are sub-100, and more than that I've got ID cards from Beyond the Edge, which was before the Wetspot, which was before whatever the current club is really called.

Omaha and I stayed less than an hour, and eventually left. The place was... sad. There was bad porn on the TV-- Astrid and Freya, guys, if you're gonna put on girl-girl porn, make it good girl-girl porn. There was really bad surf music playing through and, I'm sorry, fucking to the Beach Boys is just not Omaha's thing, or mine.

But more than that, the club was full of lonely men in street clothes there to fill their eyes and memories to serve their later masturbatory moments. We call these guys "vampires" because they suck all the pleasure and fun out of any scene you might be having with their avaricious gaze.

[Elf pauses to tie an onion to his belt.] Twenty years ago, the overwhelming rule at these parties was that you had to bring someone. Those events were called "Kinky Couples" for a reason. You had to have at least one friend who'd go to this kind of thing with you. While I understand the economic realities that force the club to be open to singles, I don't have to like it, and I don't.

I understand that having children has blown a big hole in my social life and I can't be the once highly-visible advocate and educator for my personal kinks as I once was, nor can I interact with all the different flavors of sexuality being supported by the club these days. But I miss the days when being kinky and leather meant something, and we had a unified idea of that meaning strong enough to discourage trolls.

Damn, I'm starting to sound a lot like the generation of gay men and lesbians who taught me about leather, aren't I? "You kids, you just don't understand how hard it was." Ah, well.

Current Mood: frustrated frustrated
Current Music: Juno Reactor, High Energy Photons

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Comments
heofmanynames From: heofmanynames Date: February 12th, 2009 06:33 pm (UTC) (Link)
Best. Opening. Sentence. EVAR.
gromm From: gromm Date: February 13th, 2009 12:03 am (UTC) (Link)
At first I thought it meant he went to an Emo club.
beanish From: beanish Date: February 12th, 2009 06:39 pm (UTC) (Link)
For a second, I was having flashbacks to a NYC BDSM club that used to host a White Wolf vampire LARP on Fridays (for color and flavor, or something like that).

Just as sad, but in a much different way than your club full of vampires.
bayushi From: bayushi Date: February 12th, 2009 06:43 pm (UTC) (Link)
Hey, you! Oh my god, small world!

(Sorry, Elf, I know this one in person, for about as long as you've known Jeremy, or possibly a tiny bit less.)

And actually, regular LARPS often felt that way in FL.
hydrolagus From: hydrolagus Date: February 12th, 2009 07:55 pm (UTC) (Link)
If you could have waited until tonight or Friday, the ambiance would have been rather better. The theme last night was "Surfin' Safari," for whatever reason.
elfs From: elfs Date: February 12th, 2009 07:58 pm (UTC) (Link)
Yeah, I know. I'm going back tonight with a friend. We're gonna see if it's better. Usually, when they have theme nights they don't really mean it quite so earnestly.
gromm From: gromm Date: February 13th, 2009 12:05 am (UTC) (Link)
Technically speaking, it could be a reasonable excuse for all the girls to be topless (with the grass skirts of course), since the Polynesians didn't wear them before being Christianized.

But apparently they were more about 1960s hawaii. Oh well.
(Deleted comment)
elxiii From: elxiii Date: February 13th, 2009 02:16 am (UTC) (Link)
Blessed Be, my friend. I think we were part of a glorious time, and i shall treasure those memories dearly, as i know now how unique and rare of a community we were a part of.

***hugs***
desiraes From: desiraes Date: February 13th, 2009 06:54 am (UTC) (Link)
Those were the days, and what fun we had!

Miss you kind sir. Call me some time.
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