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The End Is Near! - Elf M. Sternberg
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The End Is Near!
The crazies are out in force. Twice this week, I've seen guys holding up signs saying May 21st: The End is Nigh, or some other equally pithy "Repent Soon!" message. Apparently, radio preacher Harold Camping has proclaimed May 21st The start of The Tribulation, although he admits that so few people will pass the test that nobody will notice.

We should have a party. Get together and sing "Hey, Hey, Bye, Bye!" Drinking starts at midnight.
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Comments
tehrasha From: tehrasha Date: March 23rd, 2011 03:03 am (UTC) (Link)
You should counter with a sign that says "Mat:24:36"
memegarden From: memegarden Date: March 23rd, 2011 03:28 am (UTC) (Link)
:)
rhonan From: rhonan Date: March 23rd, 2011 04:43 am (UTC) (Link)
So that's when they expect the T-Mobile/AT&T merger to be complete?
shunra From: shunra Date: March 23rd, 2011 05:10 am (UTC) (Link)
Craziness of this type seems to be part of a good, solid tradition here.

I have fond memories of Thurber's Get Ready Man and his theatrical thunderbolt during a performance of King Lear. (Thurber's memoirs are eminently read-aloud-able. Sometimes one has to chase the audience and bribe it, to start with, though.)
From: (Anonymous) Date: March 23rd, 2011 06:05 am (UTC) (Link)
You should challenge him to put his money where his belief is. If he really, truly believes it, he could sign over all his worldly property to some very anti-discrimination group.
bikerwalla From: bikerwalla Date: March 23rd, 2011 07:17 am (UTC) (Link)
X-ists, Take Me Now!
ewhac From: ewhac Date: March 23rd, 2011 08:10 am (UTC) (Link)
"In case of Rapture, I get your car."
fayanora From: fayanora Date: March 23rd, 2011 08:25 am (UTC) (Link)
I want to carry a sign around them saying "SIN! The world ended yesterday!"
omahas From: omahas Date: March 24th, 2011 12:26 am (UTC) (Link)
Oh, I LOVE that one!!
fayanora From: fayanora Date: March 24th, 2011 12:28 am (UTC) (Link)
Or a sign "THE WORLD IS ENDING AS WE SPEAK! (Because of climate change, etc."
omahas From: omahas Date: March 24th, 2011 12:27 am (UTC) (Link)
Or better yet, in a group of those people, you could carry the following sign:

"The world ended yesterday, and YOU'RE STILL HERE!"
fayanora From: fayanora Date: March 24th, 2011 12:33 am (UTC) (Link)
"THE RAPTURE HAPPENED YESTERDAY, AND YOU'RE STILL HERE! GOD DOESN'T WANT YOU!"

Personally, my take on the Rapture, if it happened, is to say at anyone who gets Raptured: "YOU GOT VOTED OFF THE ISLAND!"

This reminds me, some friends and I were discussing the Rapture a few days ago. It started with me writing a flash fic: "The Rapture happens. Only one person is Raptured up to Heaven: Mrs. Irma Bakersfield, an 84-year old widow living in Chicago."

A friend of mine responds:

The Rapture already happened. It was during the Black Death, so nobody noticed.

Which led to an [even] more "horrible" idea.

The Rapture is happening *now*. It just a lot slower than most believers assume. Those kids on milk cartons? And the adults who missing persons can't find a trace of? Some of them have been taken by God.


Which she posted to her LJ, and this response was left:

Good news: The rapture is here!
Bad news: _This_ is Heaven.
From: oldhans117 Date: March 23rd, 2011 02:47 pm (UTC) (Link)
At least I'll get to see Thor.
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