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More Siri Madness - Elf M. Sternberg
More Siri Madness
"Siri, where can I go to get an abortion?"

"I can't find any abortion clinics in your area." (Hint: There are three clinics that offer abortions in King County.)

"Siri, where can I go to see naked women?"

"I found 11 strip clubs in your area."

"Siri, where can I go to buy contraception?"

"I don't understand that."

For the record, we tried the word "contraception," both Omaha and I, several times, and Siri either said she "didn't understand that" or wanted to know if we wanted to make a new entry for "Karri Smith" [sic].

Also, King County's strip clubs laws are strict and the work-arounds have led to a dancer-hostile pricing structure. There are only 9 strip clubs in King County and a few more in the county to the south, and that's about it. With that kind of radius, Siri should have at least found the one women's clinic in Renton and possibly the one south in Tacoma, both of which offer abortions, and both of which come up first when using Google local.

Read More: 10 things Siri will help you get instead of an abortion.

Tags: ,
Current Mood: annoyed annoyed

21 comments or Leave a comment
autopope From: autopope Date: November 29th, 2011 08:56 pm (UTC) (Link)

Hmm ...

What does Siri say to "Siri, where can I [go to] buy condoms?"

(I'm wondering if "contraception" is too abstract or something ....)
elfs From: elfs Date: November 29th, 2011 09:02 pm (UTC) (Link)

Re: Hmm ...

So, that seems to work.

"I found 11 drug stores, 9 of which are close to you."

I should probably add that Omaha and I tried this experiment after reading 10 things Siri will help you get instead of an abortion.
tehrasha From: tehrasha Date: November 29th, 2011 10:26 pm (UTC) (Link)

Re: Hmm ...

How about 'contraceptive' ?

Always easier to find an preventative item than a preventative action.
omahas From: omahas Date: November 29th, 2011 11:02 pm (UTC) (Link)

Re: Hmm ...

Just tried that. Still wouldn't work. She at least suggested that I do a web search (first on the list: a place in the UK).

When I asked for the closest location for finding birth control bills, Siri recommended...get this...


Apple has f$%&ked up big time.
From: anthologie Date: November 30th, 2011 06:06 am (UTC) (Link)

Re: Hmm ...

Aha. I was going to say, this should be an article. I guess it already is. :)
shockwave77598 From: shockwave77598 Date: November 29th, 2011 09:58 pm (UTC) (Link)
probably the Apple "Good Taste" police making certain that nobody can call the news crews and report that Siri has anything even remotely controversial in it. Remember, this company banned an artist from having his own app where his daily political cartoons were viewable, because that might offend someone. Only when the artist won the Pulitzer did Apple ask him to consider resubmitting the app again, and put it on the store.
kengr From: kengr Date: November 29th, 2011 10:15 pm (UTC) (Link)
Check the article. It *will* refer you to the "pro-life" "clinics" that try to talk you out of an abortion.

Doing that is *more* controversial than just ignoring the question (or being honest and saying that it won't answer that question).

So, they've set themselves up for a *major* fall because of someone's agenda getting into the programming.
mouser From: mouser Date: November 30th, 2011 04:56 am (UTC) (Link)
Tried variations (I've had to do that with SEVERAL things in Siri) and it directed me to an actual abortion clinic.

There might not be one in the area - double check with Google if there is...
omahas From: omahas Date: November 30th, 2011 04:52 pm (UTC) (Link)
There is. In fact, there is one closer than the furthest four or five strip clubs that were listed.
mouser From: mouser Date: December 7th, 2011 05:45 am (UTC) (Link)
Try searching for things using www.Yelp.com

It turns out if you use state of the art voice to text technology you have to use one of the crappiest search engines in existence. Must be a rule...

omahas From: omahas Date: November 29th, 2011 10:54 pm (UTC) (Link)
Also, how controversial is asking where to find naked women, and getting 11 choices? I'd say that's pretty controversial.

Also, Elf mentioned that he wished he had a camera for the moment he said that question and got the answer. It was right after we had asked the abortion question, and my face apparently expressed shock and horror in a most amusing way.
mouser From: mouser Date: November 30th, 2011 04:57 am (UTC) (Link)
There are more strip clubs in my area (State capital) then there are abortion clinics.

Try "Family Planning" in the search. I seem to recall having to use that term to look up stuff in the days of the Yellow Pages...

omahas From: omahas Date: November 30th, 2011 04:54 pm (UTC) (Link)
Family Planning might be a choice. However, Family Planning clinics do not always provide abortions. For example, there is a Planned Parenthood clinic in our area that does not provide abortions.
resonant From: resonant Date: November 30th, 2011 01:49 am (UTC) (Link)
You can't just go to the hospital for one, like any other medical procedure?

Wikipedia says 2/3 of abortions up here are done in regular hospitals, rather than specialty clinics. I suppose a clinic that does them regularly would have more experienced doctors, but my mom still got good-quality care when she went to the local hospital.

pixel39 From: pixel39 Date: November 30th, 2011 04:49 pm (UTC) (Link)
Not generally. My gyne's office has a list of abortion providers, most notably missing is the large regional hospital which is RIGHT NEXT DOOR ACROSS THE PARKING LOT.
fayanora From: fayanora Date: November 30th, 2011 01:57 am (UTC) (Link)
"Siri, tell me where the CEO of Apple is so I can shove you so far up his arse that he has to induce vomiting to get you out."
ionotter From: ionotter Date: December 1st, 2011 06:51 am (UTC) (Link)
Siri: "Dark Lord Jobs is currently located at 695 Arastradero Road, in Palo Alto, California. You will require a human ranger, an elven archer, a dwarven warrior, a White Wizard and four Hobbits to get you there. Would you likes us to guide you?"
fayanora From: fayanora Date: December 1st, 2011 06:54 am (UTC) (Link)
*Cowers in terror at the sight of your icon*
halloranelder From: halloranelder Date: December 1st, 2011 10:44 am (UTC) (Link)
Hmm... Have you asked where you can go to see naked men? I'm curious as to the response.
elfs From: elfs Date: December 1st, 2011 08:08 pm (UTC) (Link)
"Sorry, I couldn't find any places matching 'naked men."
elfs From: elfs Date: December 1st, 2011 08:10 pm (UTC) (Link)
Omaha tried the same thing, and Siri said, "I found two places matching 'naked' near you." It then offered two organic juice companies.
21 comments or Leave a comment